From Exhausted to Vibrant: 3 Powerful Self-Care Steps Every Single Mother Needs to Feel Alive Again
“I want to feel full of energy and truly alive every day,” a client once told me. Her words capture a life that many single mothers long for — a sense of vitality and wellbeing, but without a clear path to get there.
If you’ve ever felt overwhelmed, like you’re running on empty, and unsure of how to turn things around, you’re not alone. This blog is here to guide you through 3 powerful self-care steps that can easily be integrated into your daily routine, help you rediscover your sense of aliveness as you navigate motherhood. Think of these steps as your roadmap to feeling more vibrant and energised, even amidst the daily challenges of motherhood.
These steps will help you transform exhaustion into renewed vitality.
1. Identify and Take Responsibility for What’s Draining Your Energy and Making You Feel Exhausted
It starts with recognising your role in the areas where things weren’t working out. It’s easier to blame others for our problems, but the real breakthrough for me came when I admitted that I had let it all happen to me. The hardest part was accepting that I had been saying yes to not being heard or understood, to being ignored, taken for granted, and to meeting others’ expectations even when it didn’t serve me.
That moment of realisation was both tough and enlightening. The tough part was seeing how I had allowed myself to be mistreated for years. The enlightening part? Realising I now have the power to choose what I let into my life, including how I manage my routine and self-care. This also includes taking care of my body and recognising the impact of anxiety on my well-being.
Take a step back and observe your day as if you’re watching someone else’s life. What people, activities, or events drain your energy? Where are you allowing these drains into your everyday life? How are you compromising yourself and your body?
2. Be Intentional About What You Allow Into Your Life to Reclaim Your Vibrancy
With this newfound choice, ask yourself, “What do I want to allow in?”
I struggled with this question at first, but eventually, the penny dropped. The reason I had let so many things into my life that didn’t feel right was simply because I didn’t know any better. I didn’t know what truly served me, what I liked and disliked, what nourished and energised me, or what brought out the best in me.
Getting to know these aspects of myself was crucial to figuring out what I wanted to let in. As I did, I began saying yes to what lit me up, brought me joy, and made me feel good, loved, and cared for.
Start with the everyday things in your life — like choosing a fruit you’d love to enjoy, picking meals that are satisfying and nourishing, or selecting clothes that make you feel beautiful and confident. Become more aware and intentional by asking yourself, “What would I love?” Honour the answer and act on it. It might sound simple, but for many women, especially single mothers, it can be challenging to put their desires first.
This step is vital because it helps you build trust and safety within yourself, positively impacting your parenting and daily routine, and supporting your well-being and sleep.
3. Harness the Power of ‘No’ to Invite Joy and Feel More Alive
Saying no to things that made me feel resentful, sad, anxious, or bitter has been a total game-changer. It’s a self care practice that has dramatically improved my health and well-being — physically, mentally, emotionally, and energetically, enhancing my parenting as a single mother. New opportunities and paths I didn’t even know existed started to open up. Although I’m still working on it every day, simply focusing on welcoming what’s right for me and rejecting what doesn’t serve me has made a huge difference. I feel alive, content, and grateful even on my toughest days, and vibrant, energised, and joyful on my best ones.
Next time you’re hesitating to say yes or know you don’t really want to, embrace the power of ‘NO’. If it’s not a clear ‘HELL YES,’ then it’s a no. Tap into your body and emotions as your ultimate guide. As a single mum, you can’t afford to waste your time and energy. Let your priorities guide you in making the powerful choice to say ‘NO’ when it’s needed.
Why It’s Vital for Single Mothers to Embrace Aliveness in Their Lives
What’s most important to you? If I had to guess, it’s your children and giving them the best life possible. But here’s the thing: that requires YOU — your best self. And sometimes, that means saying no to anything that stands in your way, including routines that don’t support your well-being and the needs of your body.
When you feel healthy and vibrant, it’s more than just a personal win; it creates positive ripples that touch everyone around you. Feeling good helps those you love to thrive too. For me, it’s been amazing to see my children view me as a safe, nurturing presence and to watch them express themselves more fully. By living in a way that makes us feel truly alive, we invite everyone around us to share in that energy. And the right people will naturally join the celebration.
Sukaina Jae
Simplifying Motherhood for Single Mums
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Article first published on medium.com